body mass and dick size

two days after a night with a 5'8" man and his dick of about 6.5" in girth...

me: well... i've finally, finally, finally realised that there is absolutely no correlation between body mass and dick size
friend: lol, congratulations
me: thank you!
friend: what has brought oyu to this earthshattering conclusion?
me: my mid-morning tryst!
friend: with?
me: a guy who works on contract with ABC Company
friend: and he was teeny tiny?
me: no. not really. his was below average in length but it was acceptable. he was definitely below average in girth though... in fact, bordering on that previous Mr 2.5"
friend: poor boy
me: but it was alright. it wasn't the greatest, but it wasn't the worst. at least his built beefy body compensated for that shortcoming
friend: thats always a benefit
me: all i need now is a man of 5 feet with a 12 inch dick and I would definitely have seen it all!
friend: am sure its out there
me: don't say that. please... it just doesn't bear thinking... i need to have some faith in a semblance of "normality" and "predictability" in this world...

Mr 2.5"

Look! I'm not a size-queen. Really... I'm not. I don't need a nine-inch dick, let alone a twelve-inch monster, to satisfy me. All I need is an average length penis with average girth to fill me up pleasantly and wonderfully. I don't need an extra large instrument to literally prise me apart... I'm serious!

That said, I finally discovered the limits of my tolerance. The lower limits, that is! I went to bed with a 6'2" tall, relatively big-sized white guy and discovered, when I unzipped his trousers, .... surprise! surprise! 2.5 inches! Hard! And no thicker than a 20 sen coin! And very veiny at that!

So... let me tell you what I learnt:

(1) It's not pleasant sucking on a short hard veiny dick. It was like sucking on a dry tree branch instead of a luscious, healthy, meaty body part - think an extra thick pencil! And because it was so small, there was quite a bit of extra room in my mouth. I started to wonder why bother?!? There was almost nothing to suck on...!

(2) You know how some people say that the difference between a small and a big dick is a tickle and a fuck?!? Well... it's true! He slipped it inside and like Samantha (of Sex & the City), I went: "is that it?!?" And when he pumped me, my brain started thinking: "Is that a finger rubbing me inside?!? I'm not feeling what I should be feeling...!" I let him fuck me twice just to be sure I wasn't imagining things... but I quickly sent him home after that.

Lesson learnt? Never go to bed with a man who has less than 5 inches unless all we end up doing is have him suck me off!

men and drinks

my take on men and their drinks...

• british men are like their tea - very bland.
• american men are like their coffee - plain and perky, but strong.
• australian men are like their wine - young, bright and very eager to have you try them.
• malaysian men are like their teh tarik - as bland as the english but all clouded by milk, making them very wishy-washy

scabs over bum

my bum itched a few days ago - no, not "that" way - probably from a mosquito or insect bite, and i couldn't help myself from scratching it over and over again until the skin became raw and started to bleed. well... predictably, there's a rather huge patch of scabs, and probably scars, over the left cheek of my bum now. i can't really see but it can't look good. i definitely am not exposing myself to a date. sadly, that means no sex for a few days...

equal rights

Marriage is love.

mobile phones and cruising

A really cute guy, who was obviously gay, was sitting across from me the other day when I was travelling on the LRT. I thought I would catch his attention and flirt with him, hoping that it would lead to more. Sadly, he was buried in his phone throughout the entire 20-minute journey. He was either sending SMSes or playing some high-tech game. Or his phone must have been extremely attractive. At any rate, we didn't lock eyes and soon he got off the train.

Mobile phones are really killing the gay scene. You can hardly cruise anyone anymore. Everyone's too busy with SMSes or games to pay any attention to anyone around them. At least if they are making calls, their eyes would still scan around - but honestly, how many people use their mobile phones for phone calls these days?!?

Gone are the days when you could walk around town and have a bit of fun cruising guys. Now you have to SMS them first before you'd catch their attention. And then you'd end up flirting virtually instead of doing IT for real.

shopping like a woman

i bought a small black bag at isetan on sunday.

did i need a bag?
no

did i want a bag?
no

so, why did i buy a bag?
dunno. it was there. it was on sale. it looked nice. i had nothing else to do.


oh god. i'm begining to shop like a woman!

jerk!

men can be such pricks!

i've been chatting and talking to this sexy looking older man for a few days when he pulled a stupid stunt on me last night.

we were talking on the phone when i called him an "idiot" and said "go away" - all in jest, of course. but he took me seriously! the idiot!

he hung up. i tried calling him back, but his line was "busy". i sent him a few SMSes with funny but appeasing messages. i tried calling him again a couple of times, but no answer. in fact, it's been 24-hours and i still haven't heard from him at all!

what a jerk!

sudah-lah! i don't need to suffer such rubbish. especially not from a man who i haven't yet met, who's attached (but not getting any from his boyfriend) and who is unemployed with no visible sources of income.

if he's trying to play harder to get than a nun - he'd better think again.

men!! honestly!
who do they think they are?!?

pink alert!

ooo. parties

Pink Alert!
14 November 2004, Sunday (Hari Raya Eve)
9 pm till late
Orange Club - 1, Jalan Kia Peng, Kuala Lumpur
DJ Sawa (Japan) & DJ Princess Ann (KL)
At Door Tickets - RM45 includes first drink

Pink Recovery
15 November 2004, Monday (Hari Raya)
9 pm till late
Buddaba - 924 & 926 Jalan P Ramlee, 50250 Kuala Lumpur
DJ Bobbi B (KL) and DJ Louis
At Door Tickets RM25 include first drink

VIP Tickets at RM60 for Both Parties (with exclusive limited gifts for early birds).

For more "PINK" info, visit this site.
Or call +6016 320 7746 / +6012 658 6831.

hmm... who wants to go with me?!?
better yet, will any nice man take me out?!!

a cheap date

in an attempt to forget this stupid man who refuses to give me the time of day, i went out with a guy from Penang who had been wanting to meet me and who i thought would at least provide mildly interesting company. i was wrong.

guys - you don't have to slurp your food. use utensils to guide them into your mouth. that's what they're for.

also, you don't have to chew with your mouth open. chewing with your mouth closed is equally effective. and less distracting to your dining partners.

also, if you intend to make an impression, dinner in a cheap food court isn't the best choice of venues. you might want to think about spending more than MYR13 on a meal for two. or is this the china-man from Penang stereotype acting up?

finally, using a photo that is several years old and very possibly doctored as your "calling card" isn't a very smart idea. you'll be found out.

... sigh ...

it's so hard to find a decent date these days.

men who like me, i don't like. men i like, don't like me.
the world is a merry-go-round.